Week 11 - Forgiveness

The hurt that comes with divorce is a barrier that prevents many people from forgiving their former spouse. This seminar shows you why forgiveness is important and how you can begin the process of forgiving.

Week 11: Forgiveness

There is no denying that forgiveness is a difficult thing to deal with. It’s hard to forgive someone who has hurt you so deeply. But most people who have been successful in forgiving will tell you it’s worth the effort. Spend time this week finding out what the Bible says about forgiveness.

Day 1 — Why do I have to forgive my “ex”?

You may be so angry or hurt by what your former spouse has done that you might not feel like forgiving him or her. Forgiveness is not a feeling. It’s something God expects you to do.

Read Ephesians 4:31–32. What do you need to get rid of? (verse 31)

What else do you need to do? (verse 32)

Read Colossians 3:12–13. What do these verses suggest?

Do you deserve God’s forgiveness? Why or why not?

Why is it hard to forgive your former spouse?

Day 2 — But I’m being attacked!

Divorce can be an adversarial process. It may seem like your spouse has become “the enemy” and that you are under attack. Today’s verses will be helpful if you find yourself in that situation.

Read Romans 12:19–20. How are you supposed to respond to your “enemy”?

What does this achieve?

Read Matthew 5:44. How might you pray for your spouse?

Read Proverbs 16:7. This verse says that your “enemies” can live at peace with you.How can this happen?

Is your husband or wife really an “enemy”?

Day 3 — If I haven’t forgiven

When you don’t forgive, you must live with the consequences of your unforgiveness. Unforgiveness leads to bitterness and can even affect your health. More significantly, it can affect your relationship with God.

Read Matthew 6:14–15. What effect can unforgiveness have on your life?

Read Psalm 66:18. How can unforgiveness affect your prayers?

What specifically are you refusing to forgive your former spouse for?

Day 4 — Forgiveness breakthrough

Letting go of your “right” to restitution or revenge is one key step in reaching the point of forgiveness. It allows you to move your attention from the past to what lies ahead of you.

Read Philippians 3:13–14. In verse 13, Paul is talking about his past.What is his attitude toward it?

While not fully forgetting it, Paul considers the matters “done and settled.” What is his focus and goal now?

Read Isaiah 43:25. What does God do once He forgives you?

Why should you forgive your former spouse?

Day 5 — Forgiveness: square one

It’s hard to forgive someone else if you have never experienced God’s forgiveness. We have all done wrong things (Romans 3:23 says “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”).

If you have never received God’s forgiveness or if it’s been a while since you asked Him to forgive you, then it’s important to seek His forgiveness in your life before attempting to forgive someone else.

Read 1 John 1:9. What must you do to receive God’s forgiveness?

If you do this, what will He do?

Read Ephesians 4:32. What is the source of your forgiveness from God?

Read Romans 10:9. How can you have a relationship with Jesus?

Read Romans 6:23. What are you being saved from?